A bottle brush resembles a toilet brush to a three year old.
When having children over that are under three years old, do not let the baby sleep in the playpen, the children may just take the baby’s diaper off thinking he is a baby doll.
Never go to the store to purchase a pacifier when you are tired. You just might look only at the business sucking end and come home with matching butterfly pacifiers for the two boys in pink and yellow.
The children name things: the tree in the yard that produces pears that are only soft enough to eat when either rotten or canned for hours is the “iron pear” tree 🙂
Assume that the glass in patio tables is shatter proof until wind blows tipping over the table umbrella, shattering the glass and filling up the behavioral therapist’s purse.
It is too hard to slide your shoe over a bit on the pedal of a bike so it does not rub a hole clear through the new pair. It is easier to ask mom and dad for a new pair of shoes.
Always assume the ladder will fall, the child will fall off of the tramp and sand will get in the eyes.
Children that visit will always open the rabbit cages and the favorite bunny will get rolled by the dog (thank heavens it still is alive…as of right now).
Flies will mate, centipedes will invade, and grandma will always get a new phone that doesn’t work right.
I am sure there is more, but I am exhausted because you can assume the baby will sleep in the day and not at night, and the car will break down when the husband goes back to work. 🙂