Daddy don’t you walk so fast

All those years, I trailed behind…first my legs were not nearly as long…and i did not have his stamina. He always adjusted his stride to mine and didn’t complain…He just would joke how I walked like an old lady…Then I was pregnant, and toddled like a penguin….and he went even slower….Then I had toddlers hanging on me, was pregnant and went backward more than forwards, and he carried my bags and tugged a child’s arm so we would move in a forward direction. Then, I hurt my back, multiple herniated vertebral discs  and had sciatica like fire…and he would carry the kids and tug them along so they would not put me off balance, so I would not fall…and walk ahead of me so I would not feel pushed…

Today he said, honey, why don’t’ you walk down to the beach and spend some time alone there with God. He could hardly walk on the sand, he could hardly breathe as we walked on the empty boardwalk …. I will wait for you here… And i cried… No one tells you how to do this…no one. There is no right or wrong way to do this, no one can do it for you… This week they will add a new chemo drug to his current regimen because he has plateaued . Pray for us.

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